If anyone out there is seeking answers for themselves about the relationship Andres and I had recently, I hope these previous posts that I did leave up can provide that for you (or even on our family blog www.growingupgiraldo.blogspot.com......I wish I could say more about our current state or even our past but, I can't. I just have to step back, heal and let it all work itself out in the court system and within relationships Andres and I had jointly or apart. Although, this is painful, the journey I've taken the past year has prepared me for this. I am so confident in myself and who I am that and who I want to continue to be that I won't let that waver even in this trying time.
I know this is just a small dark cloud and there is so much hope for the future. More so than ever before. I'm just really taking things slow and allowing myself to heal because I never want to go down this path again. I want to ensure that I heal fully and move forward in a positive way. I am confident now more than ever that I will accomplish that. Trusting is very hard right now so please respect my need for space. However, please don't take that to mean that you can't ask questions. Although I can't say a lot, I can talk about facts. So, if you want to know something, I can answer questions like that (ie: who has custody when, who can/can't see Isabella, etc.)
I know that my heart is pure and my intentions are honest and God will put the right people in my life. Just looking back on this year alone, he has placed some amazing people in my life that have been my strength to get me through this. I read once that humans tend to focus on the relationships where there's shortcomings instead of the relationships that are wonderful. It's so true and I tell myself that daily b/c I have some AMAZING friends and an extremely supportive family who are helping me pick up the pieces as I move forward. Plus, this whole experience is really strengthening my faith. This past year I've grown into who I want to be and this experience is solidifying that for me so, although this experience stinks, I know it's making me better. I know I will look back on this experience and praise him for it. I see that now but, it still can't take away the sadness/hurt.
I have so much of my life to live and an amazing little girl to live it with and I can't wait to see where life will take me next. Change is always hard but, I/we will get through it. I'm just overcoming a lot of shock and hurt right now to get me to that place so that I can healthily move forward. I'm truly not angry so, if you hear otherwise, it's not true. Anyone who knows me well, knows that I'm not an angry person. I'm not a fighter, I'm a lover. In the court system though, it can appear otherwise. It stinks. If you hear something that doesn't seem right, please question it and feel free to ask me. I wish I would have questioned much more and looked into all those "something isn't right" feelings deeper. Truth is, is that I didn't want to see the truth. But, it will all come out soon and I don't want it to come out in a bitter or resentful way but, just in the way that God wants them. One of my favorite scriptures lately I've encountered is, "Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written; 'It is mine to avenge; I will repay, 'says the Lord." (Romans 12:19).
So, with that again, I say that I'm hurt and just trying to get through this and praying that it will all work out......and so I say adieu for now.
